It’s another Thursday which means that yet another week has passed. My diet is non-existent at the moment so I know that I’ve put on weight again, although I have no idea how much and I’m not sure that I really want to know.

Mum is still in Hospital. I still have no idea when she’ll be discharged or where she’ll be sent when she is. I don’t want her to come back home as I just don’t think that it’s safe for her here in the hours when she doesn’t have any care. 

It’s difficult trying to explain why she’s in hospital. It’s difficult because I don’t even know what’s happening. She can be very with it some days and then I’ll get a call at 2.30am again telling me that she’s been kidnapped and to call the police. 

I spoke to her the other night and had a good conversation. I let her know what has been happening, that Holly had been to the vets and has had a trim from the groomer. Our conversation was about 10 minutes and as it came to a close, she asked about Holly again. 🙁

I spoke to one of the nurses at the Hospital. Bearing in mind that she’s been in for over a month, the nurse said that there was no assessment completed on Mum’s needs. Whatever had been done while she was in the Heath and Llandough doesn’t appear to have been carried over to Barry. 

We’re in a bit of a bind and I have to stay in Wenvoe until things are sorted out. It’s not fair on Holly to move her away from Wenvoe while I’m able to look after her here. 

A little reminder.

My diet has completely stopped and I know that I’m just eating stupidly again without a care in the world. I know how to do this but have no desire to do it. I’ve not weighed myself for a few weeks and I’m a bit scared to stand on the scales. I’m probably back up to 21 stone again and while I do want to do something about it, the mind is just completely wanting to eat everything.

The image above is hopefully a small reminder for me to look back on. I was at my heaviest, the last photo was on my last walk in the Beacons. I know I’m heading back towards the fat git that I was.

It worries me and I really don’t know why I can’t seem or want to do anything about it. 

I started my post on Thursday. It’s now Sunday evening and between these days I’ve been to the Cinema and had a meal at the pub with a pint or two. I’ve done very little exercise although I did two laps of Cwmbran boating lake. Just not enough. 

I will try to do some more this week, although the nights are drawing in now. I will also weigh on Thursday just to see what damage I’ve done. 

I’ll update you then. 

Love to all.
Phil.